


Can't stop dreaming

by imaginary_glu



Category: Jojo Rabbit (2019)
Genre: Fluff, Light Angst, M/M, Nazi Germany, Period-Typical Homophobia, World War II
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-23
Updated: 2020-02-23
Packaged: 2021-02-28 00:40:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,116
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22864939
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/imaginary_glu/pseuds/imaginary_glu
Summary: Captain Klenzendorf wishes things weren't like this, but there is nothing he can do.At least he has Freddy with him.
Relationships: Freddy Finkel/Captain Klenzendorf
Comments: 12
Kudos: 114





	Can't stop dreaming

**Author's Note:**

> I usually don't post any of my fics, but because there isn't that much Finkeldorf content, I thought I might as well. Please note that English isn't my first language, so if you find any grammar mistakes please tell me! I'm trying to improve.
> 
> Also, I used Kurt as a first name for Klenzendorf because I saw it in other works and thought it fitted. I hope no one has a problem with that lol.

This whole camp thing was going about as interesting as one would expect.

Klenzendorf watched across the field how Freddy was yelling at some kids who had accidentally set fire to one of their training puppets. He felt like this should be amusing, but somehow it wasn't.

He tried to surpress the urge of going over there and hugging Freddy from behind, startling him but also calming him down a bit. It was no use though, the image and Freddy's beautiful laugh were already in his head. 

He groaned, trying to find something to do that didn't involve actually doing something and made it possible for him to still look at Freddy. At least that no one could take away from him.

He leaned against a pole, biting into an apple, aware that only a few metres from him, Fräulein Rahm was lecturing some kids. If at least she wasn't around... but even if, he wouldn't be able to be with Freddy right now anyway, not with all these stupid kids around.

And stupid they were, if they made Freddy this angry. Even if an angry Freddy could be kind of cute.

Klenzendorf watched how Freddy finished scolding the kids and started walking in his direction. His face showed nothing, exept maybe devotion to his Captain and pride in his job, half of which wasn't even true. 

Klenzendorf imagined Freddy walking to him with a smile on his face even though they were in public, but Freddy's real, emotionless face destroyed that thought immediately. In some very dark moments, Klenzendorf sometimes wasn't sure if maybe, just maybe, Freddy actually didn't care about him, just like it seemed in public.

It was stupid, but he still couldn't shake that off completely. After all, Freddy was the first person in a very long time that had showed him love.

"Sir." Freddy stopped in front of him, his eyes not leaving Klenzendorf's. "Apparently the weather won't be too good later and it is supposed to rain; are we still going to take the children to the woods to practise fire making?"

Klenzendorf chuckled and he was pretty sure he saw something like a smile on Freddy's lips too. "Oh yeah, let's take them. Maybe they'll have to make a fire in the Russian winter- this is going to be really good practise."

"Understood, sir." Klenzendorf was pretty proud that Freddy was always able to hide his feelings accordingly, but right now, he wished the other man would just show him a little sign that he cared. Even if it was selfish.

He looked over to Fräulein Rahm and realised that she was watching them. Great, he couldn't even do something slightly risky now. "Finkel?"

Freddy's body straightened and he awaited his next order, his eyes still firmly on his Captain. This was probably the only thing that could make people realise that something was going on between them; this absolute fixation of Freddy on him. Most people judged it as nothing more than respect though.

"Bring me some more alcohol please. I don't think I'll make it through the next hours otherwise."

"Of course." If Freddy judged him for it, he didn't show it. "Do you have any preference?"

Klenzendorf knew that whatever Freddy brought him, he would be satisfied with it and most likely, Freddy knew that too. The reason he asked was either because he wanted to show Klenzendorf that he cared about him or just because he wanted to talk to him longer. At least that was what Klenzendorf wanted the reason to be. He really, really craved Freddy right now- not long ago, he hadn't even known it was possible that one could miss someone so much while standing right next to them.

"Just something strong I guess." Klenzendorf leaned further against the pole, crossing his arms as if to not let his feelings come out. 

Freddy nodded and something like worry seemed to cross his eyes. He looked for an answer in Klenzendorf's face, but didn't find anything and just stood there for a second, unsure of what to say. 

Klenzendorf wished he could give him an answer to his silent question, but he couldn't, so he just stared back at him.

"It is also reported that it will rain throughout the night, Captain. That means we won't be able to hear the kids at night, so I think we should remind them again to not do anything stupid and stay in their tents because we won't be able to come and help them if something happens." Freddy threw him a last look before he turned around. "I'll go and get your drink now, sir."

Klenzendorf watched him walking away and frowned. What exactly had the last bit with the rain been for? Had Freddy been trying to tell him something? Of course he had. Klenzendorf had just thought that by now, they were a bit better at sending each other secret messages, but oh well.

It was dumb that they had to code their words anyway.

Raining at night... not hearing the kids... Why would he care about that? You obviously couldn't hear stuff when it rained.

Klenzendorf's eyebrows shot up when he finally got what Freddy had been trying to tell him. Sure, he wouldn't hear it if a kid decided to fall down a tree and die or something during nighttime, but that would also mean that no one would hear what he did.

And that in return meant that Freddy would most likely come and visit him in his tent tonight, given that no one would be able to hear him.

Clever man. Klenzendorf had only once made the mistake of underestimating Freddy's intelligence and he would sure as hell never do it again. 

Freddy was also really compassionate, far too much for his own good. The reason he had mentioned the rain was ultimatively not because had wanted to tell Klenzendorf he would be able to come over at night, but because he had wanted to comfort him. Klenzendorf hadn't said anything, but Freddy had just realised he wasn't feeling well and had tried to help him.

Klenzendorf really didn't deserve him. Especially since hiding feelings like this really wasn't like Freddy; if he would have just fallen in love with a woman instead, he could have all the open romance he wanted. Instead, he was stuck with Klenzendorf, who he could only ever be affectionate with behind closed doors.

He sighed and continued to watch some of the kids with a miserable expression. He wished he wouldn't spend so much time on thinking about what might be, but he found it increasingly difficult, because he knew that the end was coming. Slowly, but surely.

Also, with every passing day, he found himself caring more and more about Freddy. He had loved him for a while already, but right now he realised just how much he really loved him, loved every little part of him and how he wanted to do nothing but spend all of his time in his presence and making him smile.

It was stupid how much it hurt to love Freddy, but as long as he had him, Klenzendorf would continue to do so. And really, if it hadn't been for Freddy, he doubted he would have made it this far anyway.

The rain came, and it didn't stop. As soon as the sun had setted and the kids had gone to their tents, Klenzendorf heard someone open his tent and soundly lay down despite him, snuggling against his shoulder.

"Hello."

"Hello, Freddy." Just saying the other's name felt so good, so intimate. He moved a bit to the left to make more space and pulled Freddy with him. 

Klenzendorf felt Freddy's hand touch his chin and when the other one slowly moved his head to face him, he oblieged without question. It was fairly dark in the tent, besides the little lamp Klenzendorf had lighted, but he could still make out most of Freddy's face.

He looked concerned, but smiled when their eyes met. His beautiful smile that he was never able to show outside. "I missed you."

His tender voice managed to even make Klenzendorf smile helplessly. "You were with me all day."

"You know that's not what I mean." Freddy supported his head on his elbow. "Could you maybe move a bit and lie on your side? I would really like to see more than just your side profile."

Klenzendorf snorted, but did as was asked immediately. "That's no way to speak to your Captain, just so you know."

"I am aware, yes." Freddy let his hand wander through Klenzendorf's hair, still a smile on his face. He had always been eager to show affection, but at the beginning of their relationship had been very hesistant. Now though, he didn't bother with etiquette or embarrassement anymore.

Klenzendorf closed his eyes, content with knowing that Freddy was here with him while the rain shielded them from the rest of the world.

"Kurt?"

Freddy was the only person that ever used his first name.

"Hm?"

"Were you feeling bad today?"

The genuine concern in his voice made Klenzendorf feel like shit. "I mean, I guess. But it's hard to feel good teaching kids bullshit, so you shouldn't expect much."

Freddy wasn't satisfied and Klenzendorf felt forced to open his eyes. "But you looked worse than usual today. Like something was on your mind." He came closer, his breath touching Klenzendorf's face. "Just tell me the truth. You weren't feeling good, right?"

Klenzendorf nodded, Freddy's eyes fixated on him. It was a tender look now though, more than just admiration.

Freddy took his response in, then he slowly moved forward to pull Klenzendorf into a soft kiss. One of his arms went behind Klenzendorf's back while the other one continued to play with the other one's hair. They stayed like that for a while, just exchanging sweet kisses, till Klenzendorf pulled Freddy's hand down and intertwined their fingers. They stopped the kiss and Freddy gave him one of his blinding smiles again that made Klenzendorf's heart move in a way he hadn't known it could anymore.

This was probably the thing he loved most about Freddy. He didn't ask why Klenzendorf was feeling down because he wasn't stupid and he also didn't use empty words that lulled him into a world that wasn't real- he simply comforted him and showered him with more love than Klenzendorf deserved.

Klenzendorf left a few kisses on Freddy's neck, enjoying the sounds the other one made. 

"I love you, Kurt." It hadn't been more than a whisper, but it was more than enough. "I love you so much."

Klenzendorf's lips touched Freddy's again. "I love you too."

Freddy kissed him and then buried his face in Klenzendorf's neck, leading into them embracing each other. "You're doing great out there, you know that? I'm so proud to be with you. I wouldn't want anything but you." The words were spoken directly into his ear, his voice hiding the love not one bit.

Klenzendorf swallowed, trying not to cry at how impossibly sweet of a person Freddy was. "Thank you."

"No thank you needed. I sincerely mean that." 

"You're too good to me."

"I'm exactly as good to you as you deserve it." 

Freddy traced Klenzendorf's jawline with his finger and began to kiss along it. "I'm so happy I met you."

Klenzendorf just pulled him closer, unable to answer. He wouldn't be able to express how much gratitude he felt right now anyway, not with Freddy responding to his feelings just how he needed it and making him feel happier than he had ever been.

"Freddy?"

"Yes?"

They had gone back to facing each other, their noses nearly touching. "I really hate these fucking brats. Don't know how I'll survive the next days."

Freddy giggled. 

"What? Don't agree with me?"

"Oh no, I totally do. I've never liked kids anyway."

Now it was Klenzendorf's time to laugh. "Yeah, I could tell by the way you yelled at them. 'No stabbing', wasn't it?"

"Very funny." 

"Great that you agree."

Freddy tried to act insulted. "You're stupid, just so you know. I don't like you at all."

This actually made Klenzendorf smile more than before; not just because Freddy was a terrible actor, but because he could clearly hear that it wasn't true. Almost absurdedly so.

He took a deep breath, taking in Freddy's scent and closed his eyes again. He knew he couldn't capture this feeling forever, but right now, it almost felt possible, so impossibly close that he couldn't help but imagine it.

Really, he had always been a dreamer.


End file.
